Sunday, April 6, 2025

The Joy of Giving

The Joy of giving starts from the heart.Not many can do it.It requires a pot full of love brewing within you.Giving when you have plenty is not giving.The moment you learn to give from your quarter filled plate the satisfaction you get is unparalleled.
Everyone is not blessed with this joy because to give, you should expirience the feeling of not having.
Many a time the expirience of not having is thrust on you to show the "aukat"of not having by people of inheritance.
People sans inheritance mind their business and help with whatever is available.
If you feel happy to give don't rob Harry to pay Tom .Instead see that your cup overflows with your mehnat and then distribute.
That is giving,that is expiriencing the joy of giving.
It is not about how much you give or how little you give.It is about how much you are ready to part with from the fruits of your hard earned labour.That determines the quality of your joy.

Monday, April 15, 2024

Facebook Nostalgia 2021@66

Happy birthday my ammachikuttyyy. Feels terrible to not be able to come see you today. That the times have us all safe and healthy is something to be thankful for. While my friends and acquaintances find themselves in very trying times, I am happy that I blessed enough to have you around me. I rememeber how I would say when I was younger than I wanted you to atleast stay alive till the 10th. So stupid of me to think of life as such a short span of years. I am going to be 29 next month and my latest updated wish is that you atleast touch 99 :D I love you, everything you were and have aged to be and will continue to grow to be. I take a lot of pride in the things I have learned from you and through you. I would have been a very different person, if I wasn't born to you. I would have been a very different person if you did not have the life experiences that you did.  I hope you see them all as experiences that made you the person you are today, with no regrets or pain holding you back. You have lived phenomenally and I can't wait to be around for the remaining. I love you. We are all lucky to have you to ground and nurture us in ways that are uniquely yours. As a teen I may have briefly thought that you do not love me, but that doubt is long gone. 

I love you ammachikutty. I hope you are proud of yourself. I hope I make you proud :)

My first Booking

It was quite funny, I booked an uber auto from my home and felt elated at my success.
Next time, again ,well ahead of time I got ready to book but luck did not smile.So I switched to cab but after well past my appointment I got one.
I was happy again but tensed for being late.I got into the cab and knew the pin also.I reconfirmed the place to where I was going.He asked for pin.I totally got confused why he is asking pincode.I thought now again I have to go back to the address for pincode felt a little uneasy.
I did go back but suddenly I remembered that he was asking the pin for booking.
I told him and we carried on.
What confusion we create for simple things and then shy away from doing it.Now I know how to go about it.
Many a time I have learnt to let go of things nowadays.Nothing is a big deal.

The Project Grandparents -VMKC-6

Now there was an addition to our family .Can you  imagine, my mother went into labour at the same hospital ,for a second time  with a gap of ten years and delivered our little brother Ramesh.

My Fauji father, a gem of a man, had got transferred to  a nonfamily station .So again ,we came back to Trivandrum when Ramesh was barely a year old.

We reached to the news of Valliammachi no more.My dad got his posting changed to Shillong.He once again came to take us but Valliachan was dead against us going as in those times naxalbari was very active.

But on cross checking with mom ,she says she was not willing to travel  with the four of us as it would take a week to reach Shillong.For me the former reason holds good even today.

Today, I questioned my mothers decision at having missed the opportunity to see Shillong. 

So we rented out Omana aunty's house.Valliachan joined us.We spent two years with him where my bond grew with him.
Now,I joined sixth std at Kendriya Vidyalaya,Pattom.Sarsi joined Arya Central school first std.Ramesh not yet ready for school ,was at home,Meena continued at Holy Angel's.
For me,it was full excitement.
New friends,new school.Most of the classroom were like sheds with walls mounted with palymra mat or pa as we call.
It was always fun for us giggles and laughter,with flying dusters and punching the palymra making holes so big as for our heads to pass through.
We were not many of us in a class maximum twenty.or some times less.
All friendly girls and boys.
When a teacher was absent we enjoyed running around desks and playing with one person looking out through the hole for Principal madam.
Then it will be hush.
One day we were caught off-guard she grabbed Jacob Thomas neck with the handle of her kalan koda.We were trying to stifle our laughter and that was it.

Monday, June 29, 2020

The Project Grandparents-VMKC-5

Now, my grandfather ,was a tall, handsome, sauve gentleman.You may have seen the group photo, which is there in every house.With pretty ,young madhubalas in puff sleeve blouse  or otherwise ,with kajoled eyes with an upward comets tail.

He was K.Padmanabhan B.A.,then a retired Excise Inspector.He was a well educated and widely read man.We did not have much interactions then, as we were just 8-13 years range ,annoying brats and we had plenty of things to be busy with.He never bothered us until we made loud noise. 
The BA was his educational qualification.Many people did not have it in those days.So it was the inthing to tag it to your name.It was also a mark of respect.

Everyday, for dinner ,he would be served something special, while we ate afternoons lunch.So, when he goes to the dining room ,we would silently stand behind the door waiting for him to finish.He was aware of us standing as he heard the hushed whispers.He regularly left something for all of us.His way of showing love.

The moment we hear the sound of the chair being pushed, to signal ' Iam done' we would wait with bated breath either for the call or ready for that quick sprint, as it was fastest sprinter first.Then polish and wait for dinner call.

I think soon after, Lucky and Dilip shifted to their house. Occasionally ,Lucky would tear 
the house down on wanting to see her parents immediately right now.
During these times and always, Meena was calm and peaceful.

I remember once Leela aunty and kids had joined us, maybe holiday times.Now Venukuttan was the youngest and we all adored him carrying him around.Jaya was always sulking and thumb sucking latched on to aunty's saree.Now our old man also loved Venukuttan.

Lots of sweet nostalgic memories .I miss Venu even today, eventhough he is not amongst us, as I was the one who used to carry him around always.Rema like Meena was always calm.

Vijayan Uncle along with Soman Uncle were my favorites.I think Omana aunty,uncle and Maya were also there.Maya used to call Soman  uncle achibi.Maya was the matron around but that never bothered us.

We used to feel strangely jealous then but now we understand familiarity breeds contempt.

Now we were more,and more the merrier.We enjoyed those days playing around.
As they say all good things come to an end.My father got transfered.He got the quarters ready and we left for Kanpur where I joined 4th std.Sarsi was still a kid my mothers pride.Meena stayed back.


The Project Grandparents-VMKC-4

Who does not like ice cream as kids.Damayanti aunty would make it and call us.We will cross the road and speed across the short cut and enter through the back door and be ready to eat.

In those days,Damayanti aunty was the go to lady,as she was foreign returned and knew everything.My mother never ventured out.It was Damayanti aunty shepherding us to the doctor etc..She looked elegant in her saree,with sunglasses and big basket like purses.

Come Onam,Valliammachi would ask Aunty to make Onakodi for all us cousins.She would buy the same dress material for all of us and stitch it for us.I remember the pink blouse and green and pink floral print skirt even today.We all looked as if in uniform.

Now, in Kerala, during Onam times there is a "Kaduvakalli".People paint themselves as kaduva etc and come during night times and perform at each house.They are given a token of appreciation.This was all fun filled days.

During Deepawali we burst crackers and enjoyed .

We enjoyed Karthika by lighting lamps and eating underground stuff on that day.

Now Ammini aunty and family just stayed across the road.Uncle's parents stayed at Kovalam.So,once in a way,he used to take us with them.

The only bus would stop in front and we would all troop in,have fun in the bus.The bus used to stop at their doorstep on the way to Kovalam. We would excitedly run out, meet his mother,,younger brother,eat something and then stroll around .

We used to go to the beach ,cross cutting all fences and the abandoned palace .On the way ,we used to collect all chodaku ,come back have lunch and by evening come back home.We had no one telling us don't do this,don't do that,or anyone chaperoning us.

There were times when Sadashivan uncle took us to the movies.I just cherish all these memories with cousins.

We took turns carrying Sarsi to Vadayakattu Vaidyan for treatment when she was a little kid.Lucky correctly pointed it out in whatsapp.

Oh!sometimes,Poojapura Valliammachi would come and we would go and spend few days with her .She was our granny's sister.Her husband was IG Prisons then.
So, we had a good idea of Trivandrum Central Jail.They stayed in a palatial official residence ,where we enjoyed playing around and making noise.With him threatening to put us all behind bars.

I had a first hand information ,of how convicts were made to do work etc at close quarters.Infact ,we had the opportunity of knowing and understanding many things.Though, we were not very old then, walking across the huge parcels of land with the accompany policeman chatting ,I understood many things.

The zoo was another place for us to visit.

The Varambaseery temple that you see today,was a small ,wooden ,dark room where everyday lamp used to be lit. It was on the right side ,as we climbed the steps to our house. To go there either jump the wall or climb the steps to their house.Our Valliammachi 's cousin Sumathi Valliammachi stayed there.We used to go wash the villaku and kindi or draw water from the well for those chechi s, pluck chembarathi flowers, sometimes light the lamp also.

Today ,it looks so different.

Our days at that time,were very packed.We never felt bored.

The Project Grandparents-VMKC-3

Now, Valliammachi, like all granny's of olden days, kept everything under lock and key.In the dining room, there was a mealsafe and as kids ,our eyes were on that always, waiting for an opportunity to pounce on the goodies or the coin change in it to buy 'annagund muttai or kapalandi  muttai ,which was one paise and five paise respectively.She used to lock it and keep the keys under some bowl or plates.

Her afternoon siesta ,was the time for us to explore for the keys ,to open the mealsafe. This used to be mostly Dilip and me.

Now Valliammachi had a shingadi tailing her always.Since she had shaved her head we called her mottachi.I don't get her name.

She was not older than us .Maybe ten years old.In those days, it was considered normal, to shelter a child from hunger and a safe roof above their heads till they come of age.Mottachi's job was to only to tail Valliammachi and run small errands for her like getting her glasses, murukan box etc.

So, we used to butter her up, to get the keys. She knew where the keys were placed .She was 24/7 with Valliammachi as her shadow.Ofcourse ,we shared with her also but when we got caught put the blame on her.This was our regular routine.

With the spoon ,full of horlicks or ovaltine in our mouth, we used to run and hide, to eat in peace.Sometimes,choking on it ,cough and smear it all over.It was fun because we would look like ghosts.

If we managed to get five paise or ten paise ,without any ones knowledge run to lakshmikuttyammas shop and buy sweets and sit on the side mudwall and eat.

We cousins always shared and ate and stood for each other.